Clearing the Hose—Tending the Garden of Consciousness
Letting Out The Muddy Water
Imagine a garden hose that has been out of use for a while, lying on the ground, resulting in stagnation in the pipes. When that hose is activated again to water the plants, the first thing that comes out is muddy and warm water—only to clear the way for the fresh water. The longer it has been out of use, the more effort it takes to get the pipes running smoothly again.
Now, your consciousness is no different. If you take good care of your energy pipes, Life can flow freely and pursue its agendaless agendas. But whenever the bow slips from the hand, as in the Bhagavad Gita—dropping a path that had not yet produced sustainable fruition—one risks becoming stagnant, like the neglected garden hose. However, when one seeks to activate themselves spiritually, it happens through cleaning the pipes. First, the muddy waters must come out. It is always like this.
My slogan is: "From chaos to harmony." It captures any learning process quite well. Fake it till you make it is another good one. We just have to let the dirty water out of the pipes so that fresh water can flow. And good gardeners allow this muddy-water to flow out without judgement–for what's stored must be released. That's the nature of things. Everything is fine.
Bravery in the Muddy Water Phase
Have you ever jumped into a new activity only to realize how difficult it is at the beginning? Unexpected obstacles arise, challenges present themselves, and sometimes, you simply fail. Or even look like a fool! And it sucks. Remember: it's the muddy water coming out, metaphorically. You are becoming a diamond through this process.
When people have been asleep spiritually for many lifetimes and suddenly start pursuing higher goals (for in the beginning, you must go after it, sometimes even head on...), they often face an initial phase of great difficulty.
This is the Field of Kurukshetra, as described in the Bhagavad Gita—the battleground of inner transformation that every Life-loving soul must walk through, sustained by ceaseless remembrance of Reality, and walking with the Sacred Sovereign's reign. That is, metaphorically the storehouse of life-affirming qualities—ones that carry the Self's fragrance.
If one has never looked within, there may be unknown quests waiting in the inner world—that is, unprocessed emotions, memories, and all these come from our parts. This is why many individuals refuse to do inner work. You are never alone with your feelings, and they can be nurtured through your Innate Healing Awareness.
Parts are subconscious reactive models or sub-personalities operating within us, providing some type of service—usually ones aimed to keep us safe from real or perceived threat. Parts are a kind of virtuous, non-virtuous or somewhere-in-between content with which the Self can identify.
The mind is not unitary, but consists of different reactive models–parts.
Self is the undamaged, immanent conscious essence of all life forms that gives Life, is truly every individual being and nurtures them with light, love and success—always preserving with certainty. The Self is not parts—but there are parts that carry its fragrance and resemble the Self in action.
From Chaos to Harmony
Think of your role models. Did many of them not work night after night, sometimes sacrificing sleep? Did they not present ideas only to face opposition? Did they not pour their hearts out, sometimes to ungrateful crowds? Did they not create endless sketches, prototypes, and plans—so much so that it took a toll on them? Did they not keep moving forward when it seemed impossible? Weren't inventors who made scientific discoveries almost bothered day and night by the great visions they were set to fulfill?
Has conflict not often been the catalyst for people coming together, forcing them to address undealt-with issues?
Very well—it’s the muddy water! Keep being a good gardener, and eventually, the fresh water will flow naturally—nourishing your garden and all its flowers, plants, roots, and trees. These are, metaphorically, all your wonderful qualities.
Ultimately speaking, even the current issues and inequalities of this world are part of the muddy water phase if observed from a higher angle.
But even as the great Mystic Ramana Maharshi said:
'Why worry about the world? God created the world, and will take care of it.'
What a bold and contradictionless statement!
The key lies in letting, and allowing the Sacred Sovereign’s reign to take lead and it blooms from the inner peace from within after the muddy water phase, and even during it. For there’s something hidden in us, that’s never lost—even during the most intense and temporary muddy water phase.
What Stagnates Our Systems?
There are various causes for why stagnation might occur. The key is habit, cultivation, and result. Whether you have unknowingly been stagnating yourself or doing so knowingly, I don't know, and I’m not here to judge you—but something causes it. Let curiosity lead you towards the discovery of your causes.
For if we were truly clean, we would experience consciousness as it is and reflect That in our actions. But in today's world, many have sadly dropped the task, which is constant growth and expansion in Light. And it makes sense, especially in this current time of invalidation, toxicity, and inevitable collective issues—legacy burdens of narcissism, racism, and oppression. Haphazard human nature only adds to this.
Our undamaged, functional essence—the Self—is always there, witnessing. No matter what happens, how you feel; it's still there. It's like yeast waiting to ferment, given the right conditions and timing in the Garden. This yeast contains Life and Transformation, and is waiting for warmth and care to rise. Just like roses grow in fertile soil. Or it's like the knowing on a rainy day that the sun will shine again. We'll be exploring more of the Self in the now that's becoming.
Here, I’ll include a few reasons why stagnation might occur:
1. Gross (Physical Layer) Starting with grosser things first, food is key. Heavy, greasy, and processed foods burden the system, making it more difficult for Life to do its work. Some of these include meat, fast food, and similar substances. I mean, you can sense it—I don’t need to name them all. Other culprits include alcohol, sodas, and artificial stimulants. The Creator has designed man (human) to be vegetarian and to live a simple, balanced and contented life. If one were to live in alignment with this, they would experience some degree of enlightened understanding. It’s just natural, since we are speaking about your natural state.
2. Emotional/Energetic/Soul
Cultivating a serene emotional landscape is key. One thing that definitely clogs the Life-channels is anger and other related phenomena. It steals the Self-joy. Anger disrupts the harmony of an environment even on a molecular level. It is a force of destruction that causes temporary strain, freezing, and dysfunction in the nervous system.
But then again, it makes sense why people would have an angry part in them, as it’s, too, a response to stimuli.
Whenever there is a strong impulse, there is a strong reactive process—and this is one of the greatest obscurers for the soul.
Remember that an intense power directed to a good cause to promote justice is far from anger—it’s justice. Anger is more like being a raging fool.
There can also be unprocessed emotions that have stagnated as clusters of foggy sensations. A person has sometimes gone through many incarnations, still carrying all experiences as energetic imprints on a subconscious level in their astral body. These are primitive, raw emotions—almost like whip marks, that can even manifest visually.
These unprocessed emotions can hurl us into interpersonal entanglements, which too, must be resolved. In fact, it’s what I call soul-ruptures. All of them must be resolved one way or another. All interpersonal conflicts and entanglements need to be resolved before one can enter the free skies like a Sovereign Bird.
For we are taught in this experience to be Good. Just Good. Even if you are not perfect, you can still be good, and people will sense it. This is the Law of Love. Each person feels that Goodness in their heart—unless it has been too deeply obscured.
This Self-goodness is truly in all. The proof, for me, is that I’ve always sensed this goodness even in individuals whose parts have been hurting me–and in me when my parts have been reactive.
All adversity we harbor within will grow into a mighty tree of inner toxins that slowly clog us. The feeding hand will be pulled away, waiting.
Soul Ruptures: The Consequences of Spiritual Conflict
I call profound and interpersonal violations Soul Ruptures. This term describes violations, misdeeds, and transgressions that occur between two or more souls, necessitating closure. This is Life’s inescapable law of equality, justice, and love. A kind of an unbribable situation, isn’t it?
Sometimes, that closure comes through deep reconciliation—and sometimes, through stepping away completely. It’s important not to confuse healing with obligation. The Sovereign path does not ask us to blindly tolerate what’s wrong, your Spirit knows this. Or to fix others who refuse to grow. Some soul ruptures close through distance, not dialogue, that can’t be had due to the monologue-like nature of certain dynamics.
The soul is made in the likeness of the Creator. As the Creator is the First Cause of all things, we—being of that same essence—naturally reflect this Reality as our truest Selves. But what exactly is this First Cause? No one truly knows. This is because it can’t be known through the intellect, but can be intuited. You can’t, however, take it and put it in your pocket. It is easier to simply play along—just as it is easier for fish to swim than to question the water or for worms to burrow without pondering the soil.
Let’s wrap this one up with an ancient saying of the Christian Mystics:
Now according to the Lord’s Day, gather together and break bread and give thanks, after acknowledging your wanderings to one another, so your sacrifice would be a clean one. But each one who has something against his friend, do not let him come together with you until they are reconciled, so that your sacrifice would not be made common. For this is what was declared by the Lord: “In every place and time, carry to me a clean sacrifice. Because I am a great king,” says Yahweh, “and my name is a wondrous thing among the nations.”
Didache 14:1–3
3. Trauma
Not everything happens to test us, teach us, or reveal a spiritual insight. Sometimes, things happen due to:
1. Bad luck
2. Being in the wrong place
3. Being there at the wrong time
4. The haphazard nature of the world we live in this time
5. Being targeted by non-personal archetypal and collective burdens
Sometimes, the world has kicked us in the head too many times, and we’ve become traumatized. That's it. These traumas invoke strong protective mechanisms that may take a complete toll on a person. Some even see their entire life through these wounds, never knowing who they truly are beneath.
Trauma needs time, patience, courage, and much more to heal. Sometimes, it takes everything you have and more. Remember, all of this is temporary—even the worst nightmare one can experience is temporary. It may seem invalidating to call it muddy water, but everything that does not reflect the Perfected Balance in you is part of the muddy water phase. Deal with it—lovingly, but firmly.
For our natural awakened state is perfect as it is and so is whatever blooms from within in that state. Everything that takes place before that is still the muddy water. We are gardening as long as it takes—and when the water flows, Life begins never to stop. Everlasting Life! That’s the law of good momentum—and the inner mechanism behind what I call the FLIP-approach: a progressive protocol for turning the soul back toward its original flow.
Don’t get discouraged and drop the hose! Your flowers need to be watered. They need your constant attention, love, and care. In this Self-nurtured Garden of Eden, you can create a soil so Self-fertile that all of who you are can harmonize.
What muddy water have you let out recently? No shame, no judgment. Even the best go through these experiences. And one beautiful way is to stop labeling even this process as the muddy water, since there are no bad parts in us. Remember, even the mess is sacred.
Interestingly, it's quite hard to understand how it would be like to be elsewhere than where you are now—but it can be imagined, and this imagination will set you on the right course. Being present while imagining this is important to avoid wandering out of the present. Then see what you want to experience as being perfectly true. This is already one step closer to the one and how you are in this one.
Words of Consolation
If the muddy water is flowing now and you think there's no end to it—there will be. In fact, there will be a point when it ends completely and does not start again, ever again. But what will then flow is the fresh, Infinite water.
The length of this process comes from the amount of the muddy water and choices which persist this condition—or rather, from the duration one has been forgetful of their Garden. All you have to do is to remember your garden and be patient with it. While attuned to Life, you’ll naturally want to be a good gardener. Let that be your driver.
A Word on Patience
Patience is the profound recognition that giving time and space for natural processes to unfold is essential. When we are patient, we understand that peace and trust form the foundation for long-term sustainability. It embodies resilience, self-control and the ability to abide in silence even during restlessness—it is actually patience that allows our Innate Goodness to come forth. Patience isn’t passive; it requires conscious awareness, empathy and reliance on your Self.
What if you could be patient, even with the really frustrating things? Or next time, when you ‘fail’ again? Or during the most uncomfortable (but temporary) muddy-water phase?
I’ll be sharing deeper reflections on the nature of the Self in the now that’s becoming—what lies beneath the muddy water.
Until then, keep tending to your garden. Keep letting the muddy water flow out. Fresh life is waiting to rush in.
— Lila Zenith
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